International Women's Day 2025

 

The Strength in

(so-called) Soft Skills.

 

"Accelerate Action!"

This is the International Women's Day imperative that is resonating through boardrooms and communities worldwide.

And as I sit writing reflecting on this year’s IWD global challenge, I find myself thinking, “haven’t we been patient long enough?!”  Agreed!  The time for incremental change has passed.

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I find it so ironic that the very qualities needed to drive this urgent and vital transformation ,ie  connection, empathy and collaboration, are essentially the same "soft skills" (the air quotes are not ornamental) that have been systematically undervalued in our leadership models, in business, in politics and our communities and are a daily reminder of the state of our global stage.

"...women don't just gently nudge progress, they propel it forward with remarkable force"

These qualities (often attributed to women) are far from soft!  Au contraire my friends, they're the solid steel frameworks that support lasting change. At Waterlily, I've witnessed firsthand how these supposedly "feminine" attributes don't just gently nudge progress, they propel it forward with remarkable force. When I founded this company, I envisioned a business built on the shoulder of these principles, never anticipating that what society dismissed as "soft" would prove to be the unshakeable foundation of our success, and continues to be the exact catalyst needed to accelerate action in a desperately demanding world in struggle.

Redefining strength in leadership

For far too long, I've watched our collective understanding of leadership filtered through a distinctly masculine lens. Decisiveness! Assertiveness! Individualism! These traits have been celebrated as the hallmarks of effective leadership, while qualities that many women bring naturally to the table, ie emotional intelligence, collaboration, relationship-building, seem to have been treated like optional extras. (Sort of like how mentoring women was once seen as a charitable extracurricular.. that is, until those mentees started outperforming their peers, rising through ranks, and transforming company cultures, making everyone realise that developing worthy talent isn't charity; it's just good business!… soap box moment over…well almost…).

"..we are seeing the limitations of leadership models that prioritise dominance over dialogue"

This gendered dichotomy hasn't served us well. As global challenges grow increasingly complex and interconnected, we are seeing the limitations of leadership models that prioritise dominance over dialogue and competition over collaboration. From political deadlock to toxic corporate cultures, the costs of this imbalance can be felt everywhere. Meanwhile, research confirms what I've observed throughout my career: organisations and societies that welcome women's leadership styles don't just become more equitable, they become more effective, more innovative, and more humane. It turns out that the "soft" approach yields some pretty hard results.

Let’s measure the impact of women's leadership

Let's talk data (stay with me, because nothing silences a sceptic faster than solid gold statistics!) What we are seeing in business…

• [caption id="attachment_36812" align="alignleft" width="357"] The Spa at Sofitel Darling Harbour[/caption] Companies with gender-diverse leadership teams are 25% more likely to achieve above-average profitability than their less diverse counterparts, according to McKinsey's 2020 "Diversity Wins" report. (And yet some boardrooms still look like a 1950s gentlemen's club, minus the cigars… though sometimes those still make an appearance too...sigh)
• Research from S&P Global Market Intelligence found that firms with female CEOs and CFOs produced higher stock price performance and improved profitability metrics. (Yes gentlemen, your investment portfolio would likely thank you for supporting female leadership)
• Companies with at least 30% women in leadership positions are 12 times more likely to be high-performing than those without, as reported by the Peterson Institute for International Economics. Twelve times! (Ladies, can we please take a moment…Even my most ambitious sales targets rarely aim that high.)
• During times of crisis, such as the COVID-19 pandemic, companies led by women showed greater resilience (I see you!). Perhaps because we've had plenty of practice managing chaos.  Think coordinating  the family budget while whipping up dinner for teenagers while on a conference call all while the dog is barking at the neighbour that’s just turned up. Multitasking isn't just a superpower; it's our survival strategy.

[caption id="attachment_36436" align="alignright" width="265"] Living Valley Springs[/caption] How about the political landscape?

• Countries with higher percentages of women in government respond more effectively to crises. A 2020 analysis of COVID-19 outcomes found that countries led by women had systematically better pandemic outcomes, with fewer cases and lower death rates. Turns out, "What would happen if we actually listened to scientists?" is a question more women in power tend to ask.
• In Australia, the cross-party Parliamentary Friends of Women's Leadership Group shows how our female politicians frequently collaborate across ideological divides to address gender equality issues. Interestingly, former enemies Julia Gillard and Julie Bishop demonstrated this when they jointly advocated for women's leadership initiatives after their parliamentary careers. Women parliamentarians consistently show greater willingness to find common ground on issues from childcare to domestic violence legislation. We understand that sometimes you need to compromise to get everyone to the table (a lesson learned from years of family negotiations .. who does get the last Tim Tam?).
• Nations with higher representation of women in parliament tend to invest more in education, health, and social services, according to UN Women research, creating stronger social safety nets that benefit all citizens. Because we understand that a society is only as strong as its most vulnerable members.
• The World Economic Forum has found a direct correlation between a country's gender equality and its global competitiveness, innovation capabilities, and human development metrics. So if you're keeping score: gender equality isn't just nice to have; it's an absolute competitive advantage.

And let’s not forget the health of our communities…

• Organisations with more women in leadership report higher employee satisfaction and lower turnover rates, with Gallup finding that gender-diverse teams demonstrate higher levels of engagement and productivity. Happy employees equal healthy bottom lines... a revolutionary concept, I know.
• Communities with greater representation of women in leadership positions tend to prioritise public health initiatives, environmental protection, and social cohesion, according to research from the Council on Foreign Relations. Call me crazy, but clean air, clean water, and people who don't hate each other seem like good things to aim for.
• Boards with gender diversity show better risk management and reduced fraud and corruption, as reported by MSCI ESG Research. Perhaps because we've spent our lives calculating risk… like whether those heels are worth the pain (you know they are!) or whether that second date is worth the blow dry (probably not).

These aren't just statistics, they represent real improvements in organisational performance, policy outcomes, and human wellbeing. They also challenge the notion that women's leadership approaches are somehow less effective or valuable than men. In fact, they suggest quite the opposite.

"Soft" skills build solid results!

What explains these remarkable outcomes? The answer lies in the very qualities that have been historically undervalued in leadership; the so-called "soft skills" that many women bring to their leadership roles.  Let’s do a quick skill inventory stock take:

1. Emotional Intelligence

[caption id="attachment_36776" align="alignleft" width="254"] Five Star Day Spa[/caption] The ability to recognise, understand, and manage one's own emotions, while also being aware of and influencing the emotions of others, is increasingly recognised as essential to effective leadership. Research from the Yale Centre for Emotional Intelligence shows that leaders with high emotional intelligence create work environments where creativity and innovation flourish. Women typically score higher on tests of emotional intelligence, particularly in empathy, interpersonal relationships, and social responsibility. We've had plenty of practice reading rooms, reading faces, and reading between the lines. Skills honed from early childhood out of both social conditioning and sometimes sheer necessity.

"Intelligence shows that leaders with high emotional intelligence create work environments where creativity and innovation flourish."

These capabilities build skills that create more engaged teams, better conflict resolution, and stronger stakeholder relationships, all critical factors in business success. And yes, we usually know when you're upset even before you do. It's not mind-reading gentlemen; it's emotional intelligence (.. maybe a little of the dark arts... but hey?).

2. Collaborative Leadership

The Machiavellian command-and-control style leadership model is increasingly giving way to more collaborative approaches, where leaders facilitate rather than dictate, and where decision-making is inclusive rather than hierarchical. Studies show that women are more likely to adopt these collaborative leadership styles.  We seek input, build consensus and share power.  Simply put, we get shit done! A 2018 Harvard Business Review study found that women outscored men on 17 of 19 leadership capabilities. (To the men reading this… good job on those other two!) Women were particularly strong in taking initiative, acting with resilience, practicing self-development, and displaying high integrity and honesty. Women were also rated as more effective in 84% of the competencies most frequently measured. At Waterlily, we’ve built a culture around the belief that the best ideas can come from anywhere in the company. My job isn't to be the smartest person in the room. My role as a leader is to create a space where everyone feels empowered to contribute their expertise. It’s easy to set your ego aside when you’ve chosen smart, curious and collaborative people to surround yourself with!

"Harvard Business Review study found that women outscored men on 17 of 19 leadership capabilities."

3. Long-term Thinking... or just Thinking

[caption id="attachment_36781" align="alignright" width="412"] Hepburn Bathhouse + Spa[/caption] Women leaders tend to adopt a more holistic and long-term perspective, considering not just immediate profits or victories, but broader impacts on everyone invested and the future generations of tomorrow. This approach is particularly valuable in addressing complex challenges like climate change, social inequality, and public health; issues that require sustained, multi-faceted responses rather than quick fixes. Research from S&P Global found that female CFOs delivered higher profitability and generated excess stock returns relative to the market average, partly because they were less likely to engage in high-risk financial strategies that might boost short-term returns at the expense of long-term stability. We understand that sustainable success requires patience, staying true to your values and ethos, even in lieu of some lucrative short term gains.  Something I’ve lived at nearly every stage of the Waterlily evolution.

4. Communication and Relationship-Building

The ability to communicate effectively, build trust, and nurture relationships is fundamental to successful leadership. A study by Zenger Folkman found that women were rated more highly than men in effectiveness of communication, with particular strengths in building relationships, developing others, and collaboration and teamwork.

"..it's the human connections that drive lasting success, and keeps you alive and in the game over decades."

At Waterlily, we've built our success on relationships, from partnerships to team members, our spas and clinics, our suppliers, and our community are a product of authentic collaborate connection. I've always believed that business is fundamentally about people connecting with people.  The underlying Waterlily value of care and connection.  The spreadsheets and the bottom line matter, of course (something our accountants like to continually remind us of), but it's the human connections that drive lasting success, and keeps you alive and in the game over decades.

5. Resilience and Adaptability

[caption id="attachment_36778" align="alignleft" width="230"] The Self Love Lounge[/caption] Women's lived experiences (pushing against a system that is often stacked against them) have needed to hone their resilience and adaptability. These qualities are increasingly valuable in a volatile, uncertain and ambiguous world. The Harvard Business Review reported that women leaders were rated more positively on their ability to "take initiative," "resilience," and "self-development", the qualities that help organisations navigate change and uncertainty.

"But resilience is not about never falling; it's about knowing how to get back up!"

I'll be honest… building Waterlily hasn't always been easy (my Summit keynote was testimony to that!). There have been setbacks, disappointments, financial challenges and moments when I seriously questioned whether I was on the right path. But resilience is not about never falling; it's about knowing how to get back up (cue: not before a good cry and a litre of strawberry gelato!) and then continuing forward with new learned wisdom and not just a little audacious grit! 

Beyond the binary... So how do we integrate these qualities?

To be clear, I'm not suggesting that these qualities are exclusively or inherently only female, nor that all women lead in the same ways. Leadership attributes exist on a spectrum, and people of all genders can and do embody different combinations of these qualities. I've known men who are deeply empathetic leaders and women who excel at traditionally masculine leadership styles.

"The most effective leaders (regardless of gender) draw on a full spectrum of capabilities"

What I am suggesting is that our collective understanding of leadership has often been skewed toward traditionally masculine attributes, and that rebalancing our leadership models to include and champion traditionally feminine qualities will lead to better outcomes for everyone. The most effective leaders (regardless of gender) draw on a full spectrum of capabilities, massaging their approach to the needs of the situation. They know when to be directive and when to be collaborative, when to focus on tasks and when to focus on relationships, when to speak and when to listen. [caption id="attachment_36790" align="alignright" width="338"] Ultramedi Spa[/caption] But creating this integration requires that we first recognise and value that women's leadership styles have made so far. It means that we stop dismissing relational skills as "soft" or secondary, and instead see them as the essential foundations upon which all other successes are built.

So how do we create cultures that value women’s leadership?

Despite this compelling evidence, progress toward gender equity in leadership positions remains way to slow. Women occupy a paltry 29% of senior management roles globally, and sadly only 8.8% of Fortune 500 CEOs are women. In politics, women hold just 26.4% of parliamentary seats worldwide (enter a fitting rendition of Beyonce’s “Run the world - Girls!”). This persistent gap isn't due to a lack of qualified women (seriously?), sadly its a reflection of the stubborn existence of systemic barriers, unconscious biases and cultures that still hail traditional masculine leadership styles. It's like we're running a race where some blokes still get a head start, and we have to navigate a decathlon of hurdles while wearing heels and schlepping groceries. Creating cultures that truly value women's leadership requires action on multiple fronts. Here’s how I see it.

1. Let’s challenge bias when it comes to promoting women

[caption id="attachment_36791" align="alignleft" width="238"] Touch Point Training at Sofitel[/caption] Research consistently shows that identical behaviours are often interpreted differently depending on the gender of the person exhibiting them. For example, assertiveness may be seen as leadership potential in men but as aggression in women. (I can't tell you how many times I've been called "bossy" for behaviours that would earn a man the label "decisive.") At Waterlily, we've worked to create evaluation criteria that recognise and reward a full spectrum of leadership capabilities, in some cases needing to really promote and encourage more direct and assertive skill sets.

2. Let’s create better work-life integration

The persistent expectation that "ideal workers" should rank work above all else disproportionately disadvantages women, who still carry the larger share of family and caregiving responsibilities. Our family first philosophy at Waterlily is not just lip service , we actively create flexible work styles, offer extended time off for care and negotiate agile work arrangements for both health and family.  Businesses that offer this sort of flexibility create environments where women (and families, thereby communities) thrive! At Waterlily, we've worked to create a culture that respects the full lives of our team members. We know that people don't stop being parents, caregivers, volunteers, or humans with interests and passions when they walk through our doors. And honestly, we don't want them to, it's their full humanity and passion that makes them so valued in the first place.

3. Let’s support mentorship

Mentorship programs help women traverse the dynamics, access,  opportunities and networks that fuel career advancement. Our male leaders have a particular responsibility to support talented women, using their privilege and positional power to create opportunities for women to lead.

"We all have a responsibility to those making their way, after all, rising tides lift all ships."

Throughout my career, I've benefited from mentors who shared their wisdom and created opportunities for me to demonstrate and grow my abilities. Now, I see it as my responsibility to do the same for the next generation of creators and innovators.  We all have a responsibility to those making their way, after all, rising tides lift all ships.

4. Let’s promote intersectional awareness

[caption id="attachment_36792" align="alignright" width="316"] Ballarat Sanctuary Day Spa[/caption] Women's experiences are not monolithic. Women of colour, LGBTQ+ women, women with disabilities, and women from other marginalised groups face unique challenges and bring unique perspectives to leadership. It calls for us to adopt a wide angle lens, recognising and addressing the complex interplay of gender with other aspects of our identities. At Waterlily, we're committed to creating a truly inclusive environment where everyone can thrive. This is an ongoing journey, not a destination, and we're constantly learning and evolving in our approach.  Each day brings new opportunities for growth and learnings.

The path forward is integration... not domination

As we celebrate International Women's Day, I'm not calling for a world where women's leadership styles dominate or where traditionally masculine qualities are devalued. Rather, I see a world where leadership models integrate the full spectrum of human capabilities, where organisations and societies draw on the complementary strengths of a diverse range of leadership styles. This integration isn't just about fairness or representation (though these are in my opinion non-negotiable values) it's about effectiveness. It's about creating businesses, governments and societies that are better equipped to navigate the complex and crazy challenges we face from climate change to economic inequality.

"not just because it's the right thing to do (though it is), but because it leads to better outcomes for absolutely everyone!"

At Waterlily, we're committed to creating a culture that encourages and values the full gamut of leadership qualities. We believe that by embracing the strengths that women bring to leadership we can create more resilient, more cohesive communities, and ultimately a more sustainable world. On this International Women's Day, we celebrate the women who lead with courage, compassion, and wisdom. We honour their contributions to our partnerships, our communities, and our world. And I recommit myself to creating cultures where women's leadership is not just accepted but actively sought out and valued, not just because it's the right thing to do (though it is), but because it leads to better outcomes for absolutely everyone (yes, even you Kevin!). In a world that often seems fractured and divided, the leadership qualities that women have been showcasing for generations aren't just nice to have; they're essential to our collective thriving. The future of leadership isn't male or female; it's human. And by embracing the full a la carte menu of human capabilities, we can create that future together. As I look to the future of Waterlily and beyond, I remain as committed as ever to this leadership vision. And on the days when the challenges seem overwhelming, I remind myself of a piece of wisdom my grandmother shared with me... "Soft doesn't mean weak… water is soft, but it can wear away stone." Here's to the soft, persistent power of women's leadership, wearing away at the stones of outdated thinking, one day at a time.   Love Michelle x